What is Resiliency?

Resiliency is the ability to cope with

challenges, big and small.

Every person has challenges in their lives. Sometimes these challenges are huge and life changing, and sometimes they are small and short-lived. 

Resiliency is the ability to respond and move forward in a healthy way.

It is the ability to bounce back from disappointments and get through  with the bad days in a positive way.

Building resilience does not REQUIRE trauma or

severe adversity, though resilience is sometimes

gained this way.

Some people become resilient through major negative life events, but resilience does not equate to having been through trauma. People with “normal” or “healthy” overall  life experiences can be resilient. Resilience is not reserved for survivors of trauma and suffering, although those survivors often do have resilience. 

Resilience is essential for everyday life, particularly in a pandemic.

The current pandemic is what’s being defined as a “collective trauma”. This is something that the world is going through. We have all been uprooted in one way or another. For many people, adults and children. This has been traumatic. We can all use effective coping skills to get through the day. 

Moms want to protect their children, we may not want to acknowledge that bad days are going to happen for our babies as they grow.

Moments of struggle are a part of every life.

 Your child might get a bad grade on a test, or not make a sports team. They might

lose a friend, or experience a break up. Life will happen. Pretending and hoping that it won’t is not the path to resilience or strong healthy coping skills. 

Building resilience through healthy habits and coping

techniques will help ensure that they are as ready as

can be for what comes next, the good and the bad.

In my work as a therapist, I see adults every day that never developed healthy coping techniques. Many of them found ways to cope that were detrimental to their overall wellbeing. As humans we will find ways to cope, but the effectiveness and the consequences vary. 

Intentionally teaching resilience to our kids can help us avoid leaving them to figure it out on their own. 

What does Resilience mean to you? Does this definition resonate with you? 

Let me know on Instagram @raisingresiliency