The art of “Checking In”
When we wait until we are overwhelmed to utilize coping skills, is often too late to effectively cope.
If we wait until we are overwhelmed, we can work to calm ourselves, but the process is more difficult, more unpleasant. It just doesn’t work as well.
When we are able to catch ourselves in the early stages of overwhelm, we are better equipped to help ourselves. We can think clearly enough to implement the coping skills that we have learned, and they are more effective. It’s the difference between putting gas in your car when you have 30 miles to go and waiting until you are out of his on the side of the road.
If your low gas light comes on, you go to the gas station and fill the tank, and move forward with your day.
If you run out of gas, you probably have to call someone for help or walk to the gas station. Maybe you’ll have to buy a gas can or pay a towing company. You will still recover and get back on the road, but the process was longer and unpleasant.
Which would you rather do?
Regular mental health check-ins are incredibly effective in keeping the balance. Checking in with yourself is simple.
What’s my stress level right now on a scale of 1-10?
Or
How anxious am I right now?
Or
How am I feeling in this moment?
The best question to ask is the one that speaks to you. I recommend starting with the first question, scales create easy comparisons and useful information about yourself. However, the best is always the one that works for you.
So, how do you remember to check in with yourself repeatedly?
By adding it to another thing you are already doing.
This is a trigger system, when I ___, I also ____.
What you attach the habit of checking in to will vary, but you will want it to be something you do pretty frequently.
Attaching the habit to mealtimes works for some people, others need more frequent check-ins.
I recommend attaching the habit to something you are doing several times a day.
I’ve found “bathroom breaks” to be the most effective for myself and many moms I’ve worked with. Using a trip to the bathroom as a trigger to remember to check-in results in several check-ins throughout the day. You may even be lucky enough to have a moment of quiet while you’re in there (maybe). It’s a moment of stepping away, and I think it’s the perfect trigger to remind you to check-in with yourself.
